TRUST

hai. what an issue. ita nnman Dad. yah i know they were just protecting. i know they really care, i can feel it. but hey, can't they just stop for a while and let me be. i'm not doing this for myself alone, i do love them but Dad you know all these years ila ng pakiramdaman ku lagi. all these years manibat-ibat ing takut ku atsu karela ekuna pin agawa ing buri ku king bie dahil king takut ayta eh. masosora ku talaga. is not that i wanted to disobey them, magpaalam nakuman. sasabyan dang matapang kung paybengi, wa matapang ku for the fact na balu kung emuku pabruen Dad apin mu nman ta panghawakan ku lagi eh. ikamu Dad, dahil balu ku no one can harm me whenever i'm with You-that's the only thing i can hold into. dakal namo krimen malyari, oneng alwa naman ta reason para mgstop ing egana-gana. whenever they speak that thing to me, "EMU KASI BALU ING PIGAGANAKAN!" (with a hard voice.) it makes my tears fall so fast and non-stop beat of my heart. but then i'll just silently listened to their sermons. solid Dad, kung ali ku balu ing sasabyan da and kung ali kula pamintuan dati kupa linaban karela, eku sana medagul makanini. nuko kung balu da mu panamdaman ku. kasakit ing alang sasabyanan. never did they know what's on my mind and heart kasi busy la lagi. kaya pin siguru maiinggit ku kareng alwa na kclose dala deng pengari da dahil asasabi da ngan, yah there were some parts of my life na asasabi ku karela but not all. not all Dad. kasakit ne Dad. madalas pin isipan ku pag aku megkapamilya i want that time with my kids talaga na balu ku ing egana-gana karela. eku buring makanini na balamu atin takut, atin gap. i know i'm not doing the things the way i wanted it to be, i'm always asking for your concern if it's the right thing to do. i'm old enough to know what's right from wrong. it feels like i'm a rebel child with this blog entry but it's really what i feel at this moment.

**Dad, i'm praying for a breakthrough in my life. The time that they would trust me with my decisions, decisions not the way i wanted things to happen, but the decisions with your full consent - my purpose in life. I love them Dad, please do speak to them and trust you that everything will be fine, everything is under your control and not mine neither them or other people, that no one can harm me, that i'm safe besides you. Reminds me of what you're always saying to me Dad -- "WHEN I'M AFRAID, I TRUST IN YOU."

BREAKTHROUGH.BREAKTHROUGH.BREAKTHROUGH.

***And all my days are all for you Lord, ika ng bahala. From now on let it be your way, not mine.

“Lord, every morning you hear my voice. Every morning, I tell you what I need, and I wait for your answer.” Psalm 5:3

***BUT THE LORD IS FAITHFUL, HE WILL STRENGTHEN AND PROTECT YOU FROM EVIL ONE." -2THESSALONIANS 3:3***