DAY5 OF 40DAYS

LIFE IS A TEST AND TRUST.

Yep! That's right. Everything is a test, to test our trust with Daddy God. I honestly cried today - tears started to fall while waiting for my Life Group member. By faith I know someone will be there and Praise God one of my LG member arrived. I told her that it really hurts, that i wanna quit but then i just can't give them up. I do love them so much, though i can feel this pain in my heart still love conquers all. Maybe I'm just so good, too good to be true that if i get mad or hurt by someone after a while then as if nothing happened.

While sharing Jesus Christ to her made me cry, that's the first time I cried in front of her. I just can't take it anymore. Talking about taking the risk in everything that we do that we know in the end will receive a reward from our King. Though for a while, I can feel that still i'm loved.

Thanking Leo for her time she spent with me, Blest for making me feel that i'm not alone, and him for making me smile though via text only still i can feel that he cares.

And on my way home i see this friend of mine, my best friend way back in High School. Some people think that he's my boyfriend whenever where together but for me he's one of the sweetest friend i ever had. He's a touchy person indeed, he always hug and kiss me whenever we see each other and i miss walking with him,we always held hands. But not to the extent that i love him and he love me more than a friend only best friends, no more no less. I really miss our bonded moments, looking forward for a time with him. :)

***AND SOMEHOW I FIND IT HARD EMBRACING YOU. IT HURTS BUT REMEMBERING YOUR SACRIFICE YOU'VE DONE FOR US MAKE ME SAY THAT THIS, ALL OF THIS THAT I'M DOING IS FOR YOUR GLORY. I'M WILLING TO TAKE THE RISK.***
(I write those words at 11:33am in Johnny's Supermarket while crying.. haha)